I’m sure my regular readings will probably have predicted that my “F” post would have been such a topic so apologies for being a bit predictable
F is for Family and Friends
It will come as no surprise to anyone that one of the biggest factors in people who are considering moving abroad not doing so is the thought of leaving family and friends behind.
Certainly, if we’d been planning to move further afield, something we did give some consideration to, it would have been something we would have had to have made a very conscious decision to do – leaving family and friends behind. There’s no kidding yourself that, if you move to the other side of the world, nobody is going to be coming to visit you on a monthly (or, perhaps, even yearly) basis due, in part, to time commitments and, of course, cost.
When we visited Nik’s cousin and her family in Australia, they had been there over 2 years and we were the first of our side of the family (including parents and siblings) to visit. It’s a long way and, especially when you are catering for an entire family, a lot of money.
Family
Our move to Portugal did make this side of the “do we move?” dilemma slightly easier. Faro is a 2.5-3 hr flight from most of the UK and it’s a doable round trip in 3 days (Nik often does his work trips with only one full “working” day and travel days either side)

Nik's Mum and Dad on a visit last September 2011
Plus, if you’re content to fly with the budget airlines (well, as content as you can be crammed into endless queues like lambs for the slaughter) you can fly, round trip, pretty cheaply. (Nik actually did a return flight – Faro/Doncaster/Faro – for €18 last May. His taxi from Lagos to Faro cost him more than that!)

My Mum and her partner, Rod, who often visit us here
This means, off course, that family have had opportunity to visit us many times since we moved 18 months ago. In fact, it’s rare that an entire month goes by without a visitor! Visitors are great because it means we get opportunity to take a break from our 4-walls once in a while to entertain and go for walks (if Wendy is here, long, long, long walks!) Being able to play tourist, every once in a while, is great because otherwise it’s easy to forget what a fantastic place we do live in.

Zoomarine with Wendy (my little sis!)

Cave trip and snorkeling with Julie and Andy - our first visitors August 2010!
In the 18 months we have been here, there have only been 2 months when no one visited at all. These months remind us that we do have some sort of routine and it is nice to get back to it once in a while (certainly Jake appreciates getting his room back for extended periods of time!)

My little sis, who spends almost more time here in Portugal than at home in the UK!
We’ve also been able to fly back to the UK, sometimes at short notice, when circumstances have dictated. Most recently, when Nik had to return home when his Dad was poorly but, prior to that, for less serious reasons, I did a short trip last March for my Nan’s 90th birthday. We didn’t tell her I was coming. She thought she was just going out for tea but my Mum turned up. Mum had fetched my sister from Stamford station (she lives in London) and I’d flown over to stay with my sister so I was there from Portugal too. Needless to say, my Nan was surprised and thrilled to see us all!

Me (yes, ME!), my sister and my Nan on her 90th birthday - March 2011
Being able to see family in person is great but, for the times when we can’t do that, we rely on technology to get us by. We have a skype phone which is permanently on (it plugs into our router and logs in on the handset) and this has been a godsend. It means that our UK landline skype number is accessible for anyone to call, business or family, and we can keep in touch for the price of a UK call. Our Skype subscription also has free landline UK calls for us too so we can return the favour once in a while!
Of course, with Skype, comes video chat and more recently many of us have acquired these fancy new iphones and iPads with “FaceTime” and “iMessage” meaning we can text, chat or video call at any time, for free.
It’s clever this technology stuff!
Friends
It does seem slightly strange adding “friends” into this mix because I’ve never been much of a one for “friends”. Not real life, see every day, nip round for coffee type friends. I don’t know why. Maybe I’m just an unsociable person really. That said, I’m not without friends. I have lots of them. It’s just that they all live many miles from me and we have always communicated “virtually” so our move to Portugal had little impact on any of my friends really. I see that as something of a bonus!
Nik had friends, obviously. He’s a sociable sort. Everybody knows Nik (although Nik tends to not remember their names LOL) but he wasn’t bothered about leaving them. I guess he visits England often enough for work (usually once every 6-8 weeks-ish) that he gets to see his friends still. Plus, he does the whole “x box live” thing and keeps in touch with (read as – “taunts about how sunny it is”) them most days. So I guess he’s not missing much either!
As we both work from home now, we don’t get out too often. We don’t have local “work-mates” and, as the boys are in Portuguese schools, getting to know fellow parents isn’t as easy as just making small talk at the school gates (thank GOD. I’m rubbish at that anyway!)
We have passing conversations with our apartment block neighbours. Our upstairs neighbours (there are 4 apartments in our block, 2 on each of 2 floors) are a lovely retired couple who we exchange pleasantries with and occasionally pop upstairs for a drink and a natter but they have been here 15 years and have their own circle of friends who, let’s admit it, are in a whole other generation to us! Their daughter lives locally (on and off!) and we chat to her sometimes but, again, not often as she’s not always around. She’s been here 20+ years and definitely has a life! LOL
Having said that, I have to confess that the whole online community thing, both expat forums and blogging itself, has spawned us some local pals!
Yay, get us! We have real-life, living, breathing, pop-round-for-coffee-type friends!
See, Kev and Nic, Dave and Aly? Bet you guys didn’t know you were a rare breed, eh?

There were lots of "rare breed" images - I choose alcohol - but I'm not calling my buddies turkeys, no, no!
If you’re a blogger, why not join in the “Personal A-Z” posting?
I think I’m first, of my blogging pals, to post an “F is for…” post!
Related articles
- Personal A – Z of Portugal. E is for Emigration
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